SDR Group - Participation Guidelines


Our meetings are strictly confidential so that participants may speak freely regarding their personal circumstances should they choose to do so. We ask everyone in attendance to respect the privacy of our members. We are not here to judge, nor are we able to provide legal advice, but members do share their personal experiences with the group. We ask our group participants to follow these rules to facilitate a quality experience for everyone:


1) Please do not impose your opinion on others (but we do desire open dialogue and free discussion).


2) Respect the ideas of others.


3) Maintain confidentiality and respect our privacy.


4) Be brief to allow everyone time to share with the group.


5) Need help? Ask.


6) If you’re ready. . . participate.


7) Please remain focused on issues relating to separation, divorce and dating.


8) Disagreements (and sometimes even heated arguments) will occur – but we MUST be RESPECTFUL and CIVILIZED at all times!  It is NOT acceptable to shame each other, denigrate each other, call each other foul names or cuss at each other!  This will NOT be tolerated by anyone and they will be asked to leave the group.


9) There will always be one or more experienced Facilitator(s) donating their free time to lead and manage each meeting.  Please follow their lead and directions so we can have a high quality experience for all in attendance.




* We ask that no one person dominate the discussions we have, as we especially want full participation from everyone. If one or two people are doing all the talking then everyone else does not have a chance to share. Because of the LOW self-esteem people go through during this process they tend to need a little silence in between conversations before they have the confidence to speak up and share with the group. In case of emergency or a recent traumatic event we invite our members to share their story at length, otherwise we ask for brevity so that everyone has a chance to share. Everyone needs a chance to be heard and acknowledged during this “Life Crisis” time of separation and divorce.


* We ask that general socializing be done from 7:00 pm to 7:15 pm or after the meeting is over.  We want to concentrate our time from 7:15 pm to 9:00 pm on the important topics related to healing from separation and divorce. We have so little time as it is to cover the broad and difficult topics we deal with on a weekly basis. However, most weeks some of our group participants will go to Eddie's (a nearby restaurant) after our meeting for purely social time together where they can discuss whatever they like!  Our group also has periodic social get-togethers outside the church that are all about socializing and enjoying each other’s company. We welcome and encourage as many of these events as people are willing to organize / sponsor.


* We reserve the right to exclude from our group any member that has shown inappropriate behavior, expressed threats or derogatory remarks to any other group member, or has in some way broken our Participation Guidelines.  This decision will be made by the Facilitator(s) present at the time of the infraction and if challenged will be voted upon by the 5 members of our Leadership Team.  NOTE:  This has been an extremely rare event – but people have been known to lose control of themselves when going through the devastation of divorce and their world collapsing around them.  This disclaimer is here simply to protect the majority of our group participants.


* We do welcome all viewpoints – however, if we disagree with something you say it’s because we have more knowledge and experience on the subject and we want to make sure the best possible advice / info is communicated to those in attendance.  We aren’t trying to put you down – or make you feel bad – or act superior to you.  It’s simply a matter of getting the best info presented and then people are free to choose whatever route they want to take.  Also, our role when facilitating is to keep things on topic, moving along and hopefully helpful to most of the people in attendance.  So if we cut you off and say it’s time to move on (or we have gotten off topic) PLEASE do not take it personally!  We’re simply trying to cover as much material as we can in our short timeframe.


THANK YOU for understanding and respecting the needs of everyone in our group!